Sunday, May 24, 2015

A history of the future


Paxman: Your starter for 10. Who masterminded the two political campaigns, conducted between 2014 and 2015, the tone and content of which political scientists now generally agree were responsible for the death of the Labour Party in Scotland?

King's College: Bzzzzzt!

Disembodied voice: King's College, Smith!

Smith: Alex Salmond!

Paxman [incredulous, dismissive, weary]: Noooo.

Smith: I meant Nicola Sturgeon!

Paxman: Noooo. Anyone from LSE?

LSE: [Rhubarb, rhubarb, mutter, not a clue, Jocks]

Paxman: You may not confer!

[Pause]

Paxman: I'll have to hurry you.

LSE: Bzzzzzt!

Disembodied voice: LSE, Brown!

Brown: Was it...Blair Dougall?

Paxman: I'll accept that, in the circumstances. "Macdougall".

Kings: [Rhubarb, rhubarb, of course, should've got that, c'mon concentrate]

Paxman: Your questions are on other disastrously inept political strategists.

Kings College: Bzzzzzt!

Paxman: What?

Smith: John McTernan!

Paxman: Hang on...you haven't...not like the film?

Smith: No no no. Just seemed the most obvious choice.

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